Monday, November 01, 2004

on the eve of the election, i know who is going to win...

three correlation theories that i have heard today:

1. if the dow goes down the last month before the election, the incumbent will lose,

2. whichever candidate sells more halloween masks will win the election,

3. if the washington redskins win the game before the election, the incumbent will win; if they lose, the incumbent will lose.

so, the dow is down which leads me to believe that john kerry will win... but then bush sold the most halloween masks this year and that theory has had a 20 year track record of being accurate (i am not making this stuff up) which leads me to believe that bush will win... but, the redskins lost, and the track record of this correlation theory has been exact for the last 18 election years dealing with an incumbent... over 70 years!... which leads me to believe that john kerry is our man...

so, 2 out of 3 says jfk is our man... any other ridiculous but compelling theories out there?...

sources: nps, my sister, and jesse nason... god bless 'em all...

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Yeah, but the Weekly Reader which has been polling kids since 1956 and has never been correct 11 out of 12 times, polled the kids this year - Bush was the winner in a landslide. Therefore, I hereby declare Bush as the winner.