Thursday, April 06, 2006
Anniversaries and Such
Today is the 6-month anniversary of us leaving Southern California. It's also the first day of the 13th week of pregnancy (or so we're told). And tomorrow is our 5-year anniversary.
Hoorah! Congrats! Yippee!
So Ryan, do you feel much more resolved or mature or enlightened? Um. Maybe. Sort of. No, everything's much more complicated now. Not that it was simpler then. Perhaps I knew less then and it made things seem simpler.
Well, do you miss those days or love these days? I'd never return to ignorance or apathy...or at least I don't want to. I love these days, but I am looking forward to having my own bed back (or at least have the bed that Craig and Lora offer us...are you still offering it, our true family :) ?) and I am looking to unwind from all these conversations. I feel a bit talked out...not that I haven't loved it...but that which is life-giving can turn out to be life-taking at some point.
Do you feel like you've arrived at a better place? Personally? Um, I don't know. I realized just how fine a line of idealist and asshole I walk daily. I often err on the side of the latter, valuing ideas over people, ideals over possibilities...but I'm trying to use that self-realization to propel forward. I feel like we've been on input mode for 6 months...and I hope that doesn't change...but I hope I can spend the next 6 months implementing and reflecting. I've realized that life is more cyclical than linear...so hopefully we'll never stop 'pilgrimaging'.
What do you regret? Wow. Uh, I think like what I said above...that I sometimes value ideas over people. And me doing that is as dangerous as people valuing 'western democracy' over iraqi/afghani people, you know? So, I've again turned out to be the world's biggest hypocrite.
What's ahead? Europe. A kid. San Francisco.
San Francisco? Yah. San Francisco. We've decided that we'd like to move there in July or August. Have the baby there and spend the next year or so in the City. We've several friends in the SF-Oakland Bay Area and I think we'll be able to get some traction behind some of these ideas we've been talking about.
Anything else? Well, I guess I am just so thankful for the people who have made our trip possible...those who have valued our music, our stories, our life. Those who have shared, those who have asked us to share, those who have offered wisdom, guidance... and those who have simply been our friends along the way. This has been an incredible trip...really.
So you sound like the trip's over? Well, no. Just this leg is ending this week. Back to CA and then Europe. Then we come back in May and do one last big loop across the US to see friends and family and be a part of some cool get-togethers like the Emergent dealio in MN and the PAPA Festival in Eastern Tennessee. Those should be cool. And then San Francisco. But the pilgrimage is never over...