Monday, February 21, 2005

Me: Hypocrite

So, I have been thinking over the last few weeks just how pompous and arrogant and 'all-together' I think I might come off. Railing against Wal-Marts and Bush and selfish lives and yada, yada, yada.

I just want to say this. In the words of G.K. Chesterton, "I am the problem." I am a hypocrite, talking about boycotting Wal-Mart and then buying snow-chains from there because they are cheap. I am a fake, talking about meeting the needs of the poor while I, myself, have not had a real personal encounter with a 'poor person' since last year sometime. I subscribe to smut like Entertainment Weekly and to good stuff like The Sierra Club. I give money to people who need it and I buy too much crap that I don't need.

I say this stuff just to let you know that my ramblings are always directed at me first (I don't really like blogs that directly preach at people). I am the problem that needs fixing. Perhaps this is part of the reason I feel like it is time to let the Anchor Point Experiment go. Perhaps it is time to take time off from telling others how they should live and just live myself. And that is hard... because I do not agree with most of the world that says, "Don't worry about that person. You are not your brother's keeper. You are not responsible for that."

We are. I am.

My point is just to say that I am a broken, screwed up kid who is trying to come to grips with the divinity and humanity both alive within me.

So, in light of all this paradox, I want to say that I am at least somewhat impressed that W just met with ole Chirac. That is as much compliment of that man that I can give right now.

3 comments:

The Shib said...

Its nice to have people to look up to. And its even nicer to know they dont have it all together.

Not to wish anyone confusion or ill-will but its comforting to know we all struggle and to know Im not in it alone.

Chris said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Chris said...

Ryan,

At times I have read your blog and been offended, while at other times, I have been challenged. However, I appreciated this entry the most of any that I have read. Thank you for your admisssion and your honesty. It is good to recognize problems and inconsistencies in the world. However, it is wonderful to recognize those things in ourselves.